Jason

Happy Friday: Ruff Ryders Anthem

I have a “Never Forget Tony Sly” sticker on my car. Somehow (weather, car washes, whatever) it is losing a corner and is starting to read, “Never Forge Tony Sly.” Not the message I was going for, but still an important one. I hope your weekend can stay on message, and if not, may the new message still be a good one. Also, tomorrow is my sister’s birthday. Be sure to wish her a happy one if you see her. I’m sure she’ll only be slightly embarrassed by it. Or head to Odyssey Beerwerks and buy her a beer. Happy birthday, little sister!

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Anchors Aweigh

only show

I sat on the L train, staring out the window at Chicago passing by. I was with three of my best friends and surrounded by strangers. But I felt lost and alone. I knew in the next few months I would be let go from my job. I had no idea what was next for me. With each stop, I considered running out of the doors and disappearing into the city, assuming it would provide an answer. But I’m not that impulsive. I would need much more of a plan. But above those doors I did see something. It was an ad for Second City improv classes.

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Happy Friday: The Bare Necessities

This is the real terror that flaps in the night

There’s a live action version of Beauty and the Beast on its way. And we just saw a live action The Jungle Book. I have nothing against these, I even saw The Jungle Book and quite enjoyed it (Sam Raimi has a voice cameo) but I think it’s time to use this technology and characters for what we really want: live action TaleSpin. Then we can tackle the rest of the Disney Afternoon, Ducktales, Gummi Bears, Chip and Dale’s Rescue Rangers, and Darkwing Duck. There is no better time than right now for a Darkwing Duck movie. I’ll be writing a letter to Hollywood this weekend, that’s who I write to right? But first it’s time for some Friday time wasters. So let’s. get. dangerous.

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Happy Friday: Here Comes the Hotstepper

There is a scene where Deadpool is handcuffed to Colossus and in order to escape he cuts off his own hand (don’t worry it’ll grow back). It’s semi-gross, though funny as Colossus is left with Deadpool’s severed hand. But what did Colossus do with that? Did he just toss it with the other dead bodies now strewn about the freeway? With the way Trask tries to use mutant powers to create mutant killers it doesn’t seem this is the wisest idea. So does Colossus need to take it back to X-Mansion for research or safety storage or something? Does the Blackbird have one of those hazmat disposal cans, like the ones generally intended for used insulin needles? Are there any mutants with diabetes? Based on actual numbers of mutants and cases of diabetes, there has to be, right? That’s a question for another day. Today I just want to know what was done with the hand. Maybe he boxed it up, mailed it to Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman, and now Colossus is the villain in the X-Men/Se7en crossover movie, X-Se7en. I would say that took a weird turn, but it never started out all that normal. So here’s to hoping your Sunday ends the same path your Friday starts.

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Happy Friday: Ballroom Blitz

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The first trailer for Suicide Squad featured Queen’s “Bohemian Rhapsody,” while the latest trailer for the movie features The Sweet’s “Ballroom Blitz.” Both excellent songs, and both predominately featured in Wayne’s World. Is this a coincidence, or could it be a hint to a Wayne and Garth cameo? Probably a coincidence because obviously and because Wayne and Garth would not fit in the dark, humorless, DC murderverse. But that might be fun, like the time Batman and Robin helped Scooby Doo solve a mystery. The real question here is: were Batman and Robin so hard up they needed the help from Mystery Inc, or were all the real crimes in Gotham solved so the dynamic duo could take the time for the usual Scooby gang bullshit? What the hell am I even talking about any more? To hell with it. Enjoy your Friday. Party on.

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Happy Friday: Shot In the Dark

koppa

Kimmy Schmidt, among other people, thinks it’s weird that it’s called “Mario Brothers,” essentially making them Mario Mario and Luigi Mario. In a world with a Princess Peach, a short dude wearing a mushroom cap calling himself Toadstool, walking mushroom monsters, some kind of turtle-duck hybrid things that shouldn’t be, plants that shoot fire, and an anthropomorphic turtle-dragon running a land full of castles, I hardly think the name Mario Mario is the weirdest thing going on. No real point to this. Just wanted everyone to think about how weird that entire world is and how we never give it a second thought. It’s a good life philosophy: don’t question the obstacles, just chase the goal. Today’s goal is to read internet articles. Don’t let work obstacles get in the way.

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Happy Friday: Nowheresville

Ghost-Town-HD-Wallpaper

This week I learned Johnny Ramone, being the conservative member of the Ramones, earned the nickname the Klan from Joey Ramone. And the song, “The KKK Took My Baby Away,” is about Johnny stealing Joey’s girlfriend. I rather enjoyed this story, it’s very Fleetwood Mac. I have no way to actually verify its truthfulness, but I don’t care because it’s a fun story. But perhaps you prefer your Ramones less passive aggressive and more glue sniffy or sedated. Sounds like you have a weekend ahead of you. But before that, enjoy some internet. Or after. Yeah, sniff some glue then check out these links.

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I Still Believe

Walk-In-New-York-New-York-Street-Strangers-in-New-York-09

The other day I witnessed a car accident. Everyone involved was able to walk away, so it wasn’t a major thing. I was stopped at a red light. There was a car behind me stopped. Two lanes over in the turn lane was a third car. The cross traffic was moving at a normal pace. All these details enforce that it was clear there was a red light for us. I see in my side mirror an SUV coming down the lane next to me, and it is not slowing down. It becomes clear this thing is about to run the light. I briefly think that maybe it’ll shoot the gap between cars. It doesn’t. It hit the rear driver side of one car.

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Happy Friday: What A Wonderful World

Joey Ramone

Have you even been in the shower and the water was at that perfect temperature, all your cares from the day were being washed away and you thought to yourself, “Man, I totally understand Kramer’s desire to live in his shower.”? No? Yeah, me neither, except almost always. I’d be in there right now if I could. But I have responsibilities, I mean not many, and they’re of low importance, but I have them. For instance, bringing forth a collection of links to help others whittle away the morning. So here you go, and may your Friday be as delightful as a shower.

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The Essentials: How I Spent My Summer Vacation

Vacation

In “Seeking a Friend for the End of the World” with impending doom, Keira Knightly’s character grabs several records before fleeing her home with the hopes of listening to them one last time. The Essentials is an ongoing series about the ten, in no particular order, albums I would grab in such a similar situation.

I heard someone say nothing gold can stay. When I first considered “The Essentials,” the Bouncing Souls The Gold Record was one of the first ones I put on my list. It is a great record, and was super important at a crucial time in my life. But you expected as much since that theme has been running through The Essentials. The thing about the Bouncing Souls is they create a vast amount of songs that go directly to my heart. And they spread those songs nicely across all their albums. While I still love The Gold Record, I mean I did name this site for a song from that album, lately I can’t get enough of Anchors Aweigh. However, you’ll notice the title up there reads, “How I Spent My Summer Vacation.” Because ultimately that is the album from The Bouncing Souls I would want to hear last.

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