Happy Friday: Boombastic

Basically
Basically

I saw some graffiti of the anarchy symbol and thought it seems odd there’s a set symbol for anarchy. No government, complete disorder, and utter chaos, but let’s make sure I follow this order to create this logo as it’s known. People need to know our anarchy ways are organized. Wait what? It’s funny when you grow up and realize how impractical and ridiculous anarchy is as a political movement. Also, if you’re going to put the time and effort to deface property, at least do something clever and slightly artistic. Welp, there I go complaining about youths. I should be getting my AARP card any day now. Guess I’ll spend my weekend shopping for black socks to wear with my sandals before looking for garage sales. Let’s hope your weekend is better, and let’s start it off now!

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They finally finished the oral history of Comedy Central. Part of me wants to be a jerk and not give it to you. Like a sitcom doing a season finale cliff hanger only to not get renewed for the next season. Like “Alf.” So maybe like “Alf” I’ll do a long rambling post about it after far too much time has passed and we’ll all be angry all over again. Come back from hiatus and immediately start alienating the fan base. I think I may be doing something wrong here. Or right. Still not sure how I feel about you guys.

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The NFL season starts this weekend. Officially last night. But you’re a living person, so you obviously know this. But maybe you need a little more help with the opening matches. Frankie Football has got you covered. I know he’s a Packers fan, but don’t hold that against him. Speaking of Packers, I just received breaking news. Ok, it’s not actually news, but Brett Favre is currently crying. Be sure to check out the other videos from Cook St, and if you like them, go support them on September 15 at the Esquire for the Best of the 48 Hour Film Project. I’ll be there!

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This headline reads, “Why Are So Many BASE Jumpers Dying?” I understand they take a bunch of safety precautions, but it’s still people jumping from fuck all heights. So I have an idea as to the why. Don’t worry, they’re trusting their lives to wing suits. Oh, you mean like Wile E. Coyote? A character who couldn’t even be drawn to land safely? But I’m not one to judge. Jump away, you weirdos.

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If you’re a fashionista, like myself, then you are well aware of the don’t wear white after Labor Day rule. But where did that come from? Why? Because old traditions stick to us like Krazy glue. This is never actually a problem for me as I don’t wear white. I used to be a big fat guy and when I wore white I was constantly trying to avoid the harpoon of Captain Ahab.

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Potato chips are one of the most perfect sides. They’re great for your summer bbq, or pop them out for all your football viewing parties. I guess there’s no real reason to eat them between the Super Bowl and Memorial Day. So maybe not the most perfect. But still pretty good. And it seems every day we get new flavors. I just tried some Greek tzatziki flavored Lays, not bad, and some “Taco Truck” Pringles, terrible, fully undeserving of being associated with tacos. But here in America we are missing out on one of the best flavors: ketchup! Canadians swear by these, and yet we get stuck with Chicken Tikka Marsala. I’m not a fan of Indian food but I feel if I was I would be afraid of these. I don’t say this enough, and I say it quite a bit, Canada is the best. Now give us ketchup chips for less than $13 a bag! While we’re at it, how about some poutine too. And milk in a bag. Actually, I don’t drink enough milk to care about how it sits in my fridge.

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When Stephanie Tanner felt disrespected she would utter, “how rude.” But what if she didn’t keep it together so well and instead turned into a giant, green, rampaging monster? What the hell am I talking about? Oh just this amazing “Full House”/Avengers mash-up. This is my childhood in a nutshell. Family sitcoms and comic books. I like the people who make these and want to know their thought process. Like how does one decide to mash-up these two things? Is it a six degrees of Kevin Bacon thing? Or rather one degree of Olsen? Also, spoilers, maybe, for you wusses who think that ruins your enjoyment of a story.

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I think we (or most of us) can agree humans are the leaders in destroying the world. With things like carbon footprint and other buzzwords. But let us not forget what the internet darlings, cats, are doing to fuck shit up. Very compelling arguments here and I do believe the idea for these studies have origins in this comic from The Oatmeal. Basically, if you own cats, you’re harboring terrorists. Am I doing fear mongering correctly?

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This is the last I’ll say about it being football season. It’s a nice little look at where the NFL team nicknames came from. Most of which were a name-the-team contest sent to local residents. But there are a few gems, like the Atlanta Falcons were almost the Atlanta Peaches, like some kind of WWII era all-female baseball team. Don’t get me wrong, the Rockford Peaches were tough as hell. But nothing says intimidating football guys like an easily bruised fruit. My other favorite part was the Kansas City Chiefs were so close to being called the Mules. That’s such a bad name that when the Broncos are doing poorly we call them the Donkeys, which is like a mule. From now on I will call the Chiefs the Mules, or Chefs.

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When you travel down that road and back again…

golden-girls

Stay golden.

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