Happy Friday: Mouse Robot and Blasting Off

Santa's a Jedi. Think about it.
Santa’s a Jedi.
Think about it.

In an odd turn of luck I was able to see Star Wars: The Force Awakens last night (first showing, NBD). I promise not to spoiling anything for you here. Except the ending when the Borg use the Tardis to travel through time and space to eliminate the Cylons and save the crew of Serenity. And with that I set nerds everywhere into a frenzy, and confused a bunch of you non-sci-fi fans. But you’re probably maxed out on Star Wars crap. I am. So I offer you a Star Wars free Happy Friday. If that’s not enough, you can always go see the new Chipmunks movie, you weirdo.

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In a broad sense, geology is the study of rocks. When you end up working with and talking with geologist you realize it’s actually much more boring than that. I’m kidding, geologist rock! And to my point, that’s a typical joke from a geologist. The only time being a geologist ever impressed anyone was when Harrison Schmitt told people he did geology on the moon, but he still probably prefaced that with, “I’m an astronaut.” He was also one of the last people to set foot on the moon, but for some reason that doesn’t get the same coverage as the first person to set foot on the moon. Nobody cares about the 10 people after Neil and Buzz to walk on the moon.

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It seems this is the time of year when most people check out and either not do their job, or do it even more half-assed than usual. I remember my office being dead every December. But judging by the number of year in review articles I have found this week, I can say a bunch of journalists are done. Maybe I’m wrong, but these types of articles seem to have popped up earlier this year. It’s not entirely their fault, they can’t write about things if people aren’t doing things. But it still feels like a lot of early year-end wrap up. I mean I’m not much better. Maybe worst even, since I’m only reposting others’ year end articles rather than make my own.

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Even though I can watch it for free, and I have it bookmarked on both my phone and laptop, I was super excited to receive a Blu Ray copy of the award-winning film Catastrophe! You might be able to own one too, soon. Maybe. I don’t actually know the rules about selling these, or if Nebulus Visions plans on mass producing them to sell. But DM me and I’ll burn you a copy, or just continue to watch it online. I’m just a little excited about having my face adorn a Blu Ray. First it was on a t-shirt, which you can totes buy and you totes should! Now it’s among my movie collection. Big year for me!

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We live in a time where we have more television than we know what to do with. It’s not enough that we have all of the cable or satellite channels, but now we have all the streaming services like Netflix, Hulu, and, uh, Yahoo!(?). An exclamation point, a question mark, and a period, it’s like some kind of punctuation bingo. With so viewing many options, if you can’t get your show out there, then it must be one awful piece of crap! The real trick is to make it so compelling that people will want to binge on it. That’s the new black or must see TV or whatever. The point is I watch a lot of TV and have a hard time keeping focus on what the point is.

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Growing up we always got a real tree for Christmas. It smelled nice, but there were often needles everywhere, and I always worried about spilling water over the presents when I had to water the thing. Here’s a weird fact about me, wet paper really bothers me. Then I moved out and I didn’t mess with a Christmas tree. Now I have a 3ft fake tree with built-in lights and I hung 2 ornaments on four years ago that I can’t bother to remove every year. I do this fake one out of convenience. Even if that wasn’t the case, I couldn’t care less if my tree was real or fake. I don’t fully understand why anyone would have a strong opinion either way about such a thing. Then again people are weird,  and they like to argue. To some, mostly those selling them, the real or fake argument is akin to Kirk or Picard; Joel or Mike; some third thing that isn’t nerdy. It’s a full on war, and I’m Switzerland. …Jordan or LeBron! Oh, the moment passed.

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The last time I remember participating in a white elephant gift exchange, I walked away with a bowling ball. Not even a good ball. I’m pretty sure I’ve seen nicer ones in bad thrift shops. But it came with bag and amazingly my fingers fit the holes. And more importantly it was goofy and fun which I think is how a white elephant is supposed to go. But if your intent is to get that, oh say blanket, away from some small child, then you may want to read up on some white elephant strategy, which is apparently a thing. I first heard about it in a book I got in a white elephant gift exchange. That is something I would totally bring to a white elephant. I also just decided that going forward all my contributions to white elephant gift exchanges are going to be literal white elephants. My ultimate goal is to not be invited to any parties by 2018.

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Recently I took to Facebook to ask about Rudolph playing games on an iPhone (how does that work with hooves?) based on an AT&T commercial. Then this article got me wondering if that nose of his might ultimately affect the wi-fi signal. I’m really thinking a smart phone is not a good investment for Rudolph. Also, how is he paying for this? I mean, I know he has a job, but from what I understand about Santa, he doesn’t exactly pay in cash. Most of his income consist of  cookies and milk. Does he share that with the reindeer? The elves don’t get shit. That’s why they have to moonlight for shoe cobblers and in cookie production trees. Nothing about this adds up. I think it’s all just some kind of fabrication. I declare a war on Christmas!

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If you send a Christmas card to the Avalanche Ice Girls, they’ll send you a singed an Avs Ice Girls team photo. It was nice surprise, and trumps the other Christmas cards I have received so far. You and your kids are swell and all, but I got a thing for a dozen girls who are into hockey. Speaking of hockey, it appears to be the one sport missing from The Best Eleven Minutes in Sports from 2015. Oh look, another year-end best of list. I like the approach and unique style of this best of list though. Also, sports to counter balance out the nerd stuff.

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I know I promised a Star Wars free Happy Friday, but I’m a liar. Also I really got a kick out this. I plan on using these recipes for the next pot luck. I’m telling ya, by 2018 I’ll be party invite free!

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Next Friday is Christmas so I won’t be posting anything. Spend time with your family, not here reading dumb jokes about stupid articles. But I do have a gift for you, please don’t open it until Christmas. Fine, Christmas Eve if you really can’t wait. Merry Christmas, everybody!

DO NOT OPEN UNTIL CHRISTMAS!

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In the spirit of the season, let there be peace and unity among the sci-fi franchises.

Shiny!
Don’t Panic

God bless us, everyone!

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