This past October I took a trip to Toronto to visit the Hockey Hall of Fame. I would be lying if I didn’t have many thoughts about moving there, and attempting to work at the HOF. It’s a big city, which I love. It’s Canada, which is awesome. And you know, hockey. The guy who watches the Stanley Cup had that job for like 14 years, so maybe it’s a lot harder to get a job with the HOF than I’m anticipating. Also, there’s all the issues of work visas and green cards and whatever for a Yankee like me to work and live up north. So it was just a fleeting dream.
Then flying home I had to change planes in Chicago. A city I visited just a few month earlier and absolutely fell in love with. As I came upon my new gate I kept eyeballing the sign to the airport exit. I knew I was going to get on that plane back to Denver, but I thought about that exit and imagined using it and disappearing into a new life as a resident of the second city.
I often find myself feeling lost, misguided, or just confused about what I’m doing. The Less Than Jake song “Look What Happened” starts playing in my head and I think about taking that car from downtown to anywhere but here.
My friends and family are all here, for the most part. And they are all part of a wonderful support system. But I think that safety net may be part of the problem. I constantly wonder about where I could go, and what I could do. The world is a big place, am I actually meant to stay here? Who’s to say? Maybe the change in scenery is exactly what I need.
But I’m not impulsive enough to take those westbound signs and just leave town tonight. So I’ll just walk on the cracks of the same old sidewalks and only talk about leaving this town.
Maybe one day.